Halloweeny Time

My new strategy for making sure every activity I undertake is SUPER FUN is to have very low expectations going into it.

That was the situation I found myself in this Halloween. Tired and worn out after a long and hectic week traveling and working my typing fingers to the bone, the last thing I wanted to do on a misty Saturday night was come up with a cute/clever/cheap costume and go be perky at a party.

BLAH!

But when you're a single gal livin in the big city, sometimes you just HAVE to go out and have fun. There is no choice. Gosh! My life is super hard sometimes.

So Camie helped me brainstorm costume ideas and for 85% of the day I thought I'd go as a bag of jelly beans (clear plastic bag with colored balloons inside). But then I figured it would be difficult to drive anywhere in and even more difficult to drink Diet Coke in. So obviously, I had to nix that idea. And besides I didn't have any of the materials. So at the last minute I decided I'd be a Wind-Up Doll.

When we reached our destination I asked Camie to help me to attach my Key, and gave my camera to a very drunk Bryan to take a picture once we were all situated.

What resulted was a photographic flip-book of me tying my key on, of me holding my purse between my legs, of me looking behind me to see if that key would stand up straight, etc.


This picture is # 15 of 17 taken at 9:35PM.



Bryan was, hmm, How you say? Shitfaced? Yes. Yes, that's exactly what he was. It usually takes me a minute to catch on when people are drunk so I was glad when he got to my house, told me the same story 3 times in a row, stage-whispered, "I'm REALLY Drunk!", and then fell down our stairs as we left. That cleared it right up for me.



But we made it to my other friend Clark's AMAZING Halloween party without any trouble, and promptly started doing The Monster Mash. Clark is reknowned for his Halloween parties. In fact, I'd been thinking I'd throw my own Halloween party this year, but when Clark called to tell me to save the date I immediately cancelled my party and invited my attendees to go with me to his.

I mean, any party where you experience the following things is A-OK by me:

* A reading of Poe's "The Raven"
* A room with a cozy fire where people could talk in a civilized way about uncivilized things
* Excellent music including lots of MJ, Lady Gaga and Journey.
* Jesus in Sunglasses (I think he was supposed to be The Dude, but it just came off as Jesus)
* Snacks GALORE (and good ones too, not just candy. Lil Smokies in the HOUSE!)
* A lapdance by a gay cop (I think I brought this on myself since I mentioned that he looked like a stripper)
* A guy in a hot dog costume who, good-naturedly, let me call him The Biggest Weiner At The Party all night long
* A Kiss from the cutest party crasher at the party

That little line up equals PARTY SUCCESS!!

Falling for Capitol Hill

Today is one of those perfect Fall days. The kind of day where all you need is a cardigan, a scarf and your sunglasses. Brisk and bright and beautiful.

I've lived in Capitol Hill for just over a year now, which means I've had the chance to see it in every season. After careful analysis and debate I have decided that Fall is the season that looks best on Capitol Hill. This could be because the general color palette of CapHill is fall-ish. Lots of brick reds, muted golds, and browns. Or it could be because like the leaves collecting in the gutters, Capitol Hill as a whole is slightly decaying. Nevertheless, Fall really becomes this charming old neighborhood. I took advantage of the beautiful weather today to take a walk around Eastern Market and the neighborhood to snap some photos.

When people ask me why I commute to Virginia to work, I will just show them these pictures. That should clear it right up.

Hello World

For the past year Camie and I have been leeching the Internet off of our unsuspecting neighbors. While financially savvy of us, this meant that we didn't have the most reliable internet access. One by one our neighbors got wise and locked it down, and us out.

For the past few weeks we've been unable to do much internetting at home. If one of us is miraculously able to connect, the other would jump on too, and then next thing you know someone is screaming, "STOP HOGGING THE INTERNET!" That usually spiralled down into hair pulling or stomping off in a huff to break some priceless keepsakes. It wasn't pretty.

So one night our laptops were off, and we were watching TV when a Verizon commercial came on. For $29.95 we could have reliable, twenty-four hour a day internet in our lives. And Camie turned to me and said, "Really? We've been holding out on getting internet for $15 a month?" And I shook my head in disbelief and said, "So it seems, my friend, so it seems."

Of course, we remedied the situation right away. Now we're set up with some internet of our own, and you better believe we locked that sucker down. I don't want other cheap-o girls siphoning off our internet power and getting all of their hair torn out.

I am now free to roam where I please for as long as I please. So with all of the Internet before me, these were the first places I went:

1. Facebook. Here I learned that a yellow bag is a conversation starter, and that I have a very close friend who dresses his dog up in dog clothes. (Imagine if I hadn't discovered that online, and had seen it in person!? GAH! The mocking would have been merciless and could have lost me my friend. Thank goodness for Facebook!!)

2. Hulu: to watch this week's episode of Glee. Lots of funny bits in this episode, but I particularly liked the part where Finn was reluctant to thow a slushee on Kurt because he "knows how particular he is about his skin care regimen" and then when after being slushee'd Kurt cries, "Somebody get me to a day spa STAT!" I really love this show!

3. My brother's blog to get the latest picture of my neice. Who, if you aren't aware, is a budding fashionista and nobel prize winning scholar. Just like her Aunt. Here she is looking super glam with an assortment of bags.




4. The DC Public Library website. I was hoping to put the new Alcatraz vs The Evil Librarians book on hold. Alas, they've re-done their website. And in true DC style neglected to put a link on it to the Catalog. Pssst, Website designers, A link to the catalog is SLIGHTLY essential. (morons.)


Yes, Internet, I've missed you. I've missed having you at my beck and call to look up whatever takes my fancy at the moment. I've missed the random bits of news and the zaniness you offer at every click. And who knows now that we're hooked up perhaps I will be more vigilant about blogging. That could very well happen, friends. It could very well happen.

For Maria

My good friend Maria is getting married to Clark next weekend. That's the good news.

She's moving to Raleigh, because apparently when you get married you have to actually live with your spouse. And Clark lives in Raleigh. That's the bad news. (the moving, not the living.)

So to honor/embarrass her I put together this little video montage. It premiered at a little going away bar-b-que we had last night. But since many of you who know and love Maria weren't able to be there, I've posted it here.

And if you don't know or love Maria, I'm sure you will after you watch this video. She's just too darn adorable to resist!

As Seen In My Travels

One thing you may not know about me is that these days I spend all of my work travel time in a small middle-of-nowhere town in Kentucky. It's a nice little town and the parts not covered in fast food restaurants and bait shops is very quaint.

Quaintness should not be confused for interestingness, or bizarreness, or oddness. All in all it's kind of a bland place. Not that that's a bad thing. I've come to grips with the fact that I'm not likely to see a man in a pink sweatsuit with a pink sparkle scarf and pink platform heels strolling down Main Street as I so often do at home. I was prepared to think that fourteen antenaes stuck to the top of a truck was the height of crazy around these parts. Or so I thought.

Apparently, Kentucky likes to keep their interestingly bizarre oddities out of the city limits and on the shoulder of deserted windey mountain freeways.

Friday afternoon I was driving to the airport through the KY mountains --

just to be clear, I'm calling them mountains because they are large hills that the rented Ford Focus struggled to go up and down; but am not to confusing them with REAL mountains that would turn that Ford Focus back to the flatlands of Kansas in tears

-- when I crested a hill and BEHOLD! there, on the other side of the road stood a man in a Gorilla suit holding a sign that said "Monkey Love" in big red lettering.

What the Whaaa?

I looked about to see if there was a pet store or strip club or something he was promoting; no, nothing but trees and fake mountains as far as the eye could see.

I looked to see if he was hitchhiking; no, there was no monkey thumb or destination written on that Monkey Love sign. And what kind of person would pick up someone wearing a gorilla suit? That's a slasher movie waiting to happen!

I looked to see if there was any explanation at all why someone would be in a gorilla suit at 3 o'clock on a Friday afternoon in the middle of the nowheresville Kentucky mountains. As far as I could see there was none.

But that didn't make it any less awesome! And I tipped my cap to Kentucky for showing me that I should not just assume it's brand of wackos is any less ostentatious than those I am used to dealing with in DC. Well played, Kentucky. Well played.

Another Voice Mail From My Dad

Speaking of tightwad skinflints, your name came right to the top!

Have you noticed that if you go to your computer and type Oprah slash KFC and print you a coupon for a Free Kentucky Fried meal you get TWO pieces of grilled chicken TWO individual sides and a biscuit for NOTHING ... WITH JUST THAT COUPON????!?

I thought you'd like that.

Goodbye.

Am I a lucky daughter or what? My Dad really knows what makes my day! I will do just about anything for free food. Free Scoop Day at B&J's? There. Free Slurpee Day at 7-11? There. Flap-jack Friday Free Breakfast? TOTALLY THERE!

NB: word on the street is that this is one of those limited time thingies.

PS and PNB: It was kind of a shizzy day with the rain and the traffic and the practically passing out on the treadmill. This voicemail was a real beacon of joy in the otherwise miserable news my blackberry has been passing along all day. Thanks Pop! And Thanks Oprah slash KFC!

Proud

Ok, so its kind of lame to blog about mundane aspects of your life, but really I don't have much else going on right now. It's all I can handle to work 10 hours a day (loving it all the way!), feed myself, and get an appropriate amount of sleep. Exciting wackadoodle adventures aren't on the agenda.

With such a regimented and, let's face it, boring schedule I have to take my victories where I can. Which is why I'm SUPER proud of myself for the following things:

1. I woke up at 6 AM and went jogging around Lincoln Park this morning.

2. I jogged 3 miles in 28 MINUTES!! If you're bad at math like me, that means I was running under a 10 minute mile! I don't know how much under cuz that math is too hard, but UNDER!!!

3. I made myself breakfast before heading off to work.

4. My breakfast was AWESOME!!! I scrambled two eggs with a tad of buttermilk, some rosemary and salt & pepper. For real peeps, I've never been into eggs that much but I could eat these every day!!!

And to top it all off, I was at work by 8:30. (cue the angelic chorus)

Now let's see if I can manage to not mess up what is starting out to be a pretty amazing day.