Tuesday, June 19, 2007

The Perfect Man. (Revised)

The other week I had to teach a lesson on Journaling to my Young Women. Now, I'm a very accomplished journalist having kept one since I was 14, so I was very excited to impart my wisdom on this topic. I pulled out every journal I had lurking around and took a long and leisurely stroll down memory lane. To my surprise/delight/embarrassment, tucked into the back of my mission journal (a particularly action packed volume what with violent mood swings and all) I found a list labeled: "The Perfect Man!"

And here it is, for your amusement: The Perfect Man!
  • The Givens (aka a Returned Missionary)
  • Successful
  • Smart - really smart - book and street
  • Funny - witty, clever
  • Creative
  • Self-motivated
  • Good style
  • Great with children/teens
  • Romantic
  • Loves me sooooo much
  • Tells me how much he loves me
  • Good health - good looking
  • Traveled
  • A good people person
  • Comfortable at a rock concert or the opera
  • Simple pleasures - but with style
My favorite companion Mary Kay and I came up with Perfect Man list more or less together, and I think we were both planning on marrying a J Crew ad. And actually, not to be conceited in light of the J Crew comment, this list is pretty much a list of my traits (except for maybe the "great" with children part. That should probably read "will tolerate and might even like children/teens"). After all, I do love myself "sooooo much" and I tell myself so frequently.

Fortunately, I'm scads wiser now thanks to ten years of countless dates and one TOOL of a would-be fiance. One or two dates with a clown (costume included) will teach you pretty quickly that it doesn't do any good to have a checklist of features in mind. Believe me, he'll only disappoint - how could he not? So in my aged wisdom I've changed my tack a bit and am abandoning the feature list and focusing on these carefully selected baseline requirements:

The Perfect Man (revised)
  1. Heterosexual.
  2. Enough initiative to ask me out.
  3. Can initiate and carry on their fair share of conversations
  4. Conversation topics range outside of X-Box scores/maneuvers or Body Mass Index percentiles
  5. Doesn't tuck his shirt into his underwear
If he can manage to bring ALL of these things to the table and we're attracted to each other, well then, can perfection be far off?


erin said...

so wise of you to cull through that list. i think you've created one that's actually obtainable.

Julie said...

How do you do it Getch? You always manage to put a smile on my face. Seriously, about your book -when is it coming?

liloat said...

Glad you decided to post this. Gave me another hearty chuckle today. Still find the shirt tucked in the underware thing boggling. Although I'm not sure why, after the clown. Seriously, where do these people come from?!

Camie said...

Don't worry I have a similar list in the back of my mission journal and I think it's much more embarrassing than yours. It's interesting how many of those thing just don't matter after 10 years. And yes, erin, the revised list does seem like it should actually be obtainable, but I'm out here and it really doesn't look that great.

mommyneedsacocktail said...

having gone out with a couple of DC boys myself, you forgot the all-important---doesn't spend the evening checking out his other options.

l1v1nglife said...

Hi girl,

Just wanted to say thanks.. "The Perfect Man" was something I can now strive for.. wish me luck :)

ps. my roomie says Hi